Feminine & MASCULINE Energy - Isabella Frappier
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Feminine & MASCULINE Energy

Feminine & MASCULINE Energy

How To Harness Your Feminine and Masculine Energies To Improve Your Love Life

Within each person, there is a balance of masculine and feminine energy. Every individual has their own unique ratios, and even that ratio changes over time.

The ratio changes based on who you’re around, what you’re doing, seasons of life, and sometimes even hormonal fluctuations can have an effect.

We talk about this a lot in EROS Community Membership. Wondering what Eros means? Click here.

Today we are going to explore these masculine and feminine energies, and how they play a role in our love lives.

Doesn’t Gender Determine These Energies?

Nope! Though that’s a common misunderstanding. In fact, it’s very important to understand that your gender identity plays no role in this concept of masculine and feminine energetics. Every individual, regardless of their gender, has a balance of masculine and feminine energy.

For some folks, their masculine may be more present for them in everyday life, and yet, they do still have some feminine energies. There is always duality and always balance. The yin and the yang. So let’s dive into what these energetics look like in real life.

Qualities of Feminine Energy

Feminine energy is associated with the element of water, because feminine energy is very adaptable and flows around, instead of forcing through. It is also associated with the moon, for feminine energy acknowledges the cyclical nature of life, and is also comfortable in the shadows of the subconscious and the darker psyche.

Manifestation is a large part of feminine energy. When you become clear on what you want in life, you’ll get into your “flow” state and notice how you attract towards you that which you desire. That is the feminine energy calling anything on your frequency towards you.

Feminine energy is very unique and innovative, and able to see angles and aspects of a situation that masculine energy can miss. Lateral thinking and holistic thinking are typical of feminine energy.

It is also emotional and conversational. Words are harnessed as a tool to help emotion move through the body, instead of getting stuck and becoming stagnant.

Qualities of Masculine Energy


Masculine energy embodies the element of fire, and is active and outward, and focuses on logic, intellectualizing, and action. Unsurprisingly, masculine energy is associated with the sun. Will power, focus, and structure all spring forth from masculine energy.

The masculine energy has clear direction and goals. Masculine energy uses linear thinking, and sets its sights on an objective, it works steadily until it’s achieved. Where feminine energy uses intuition as its guide, masculine energy uses logic, evidence, and planning.

Masculine energy is protective, and isn’t afraid to fight when needed. Honesty and virtue are important aspects of masculine energy. Hard work and productivity are of high value.

Using These Energies


Like the sun needs the moon, so do Masculine and Feminine energy both need the other, they cannot exist as entirely separate.

Where the feminine is an inner “knowing” that’s always adapting, changing, and growing, the masculine is a more static “knowledge”. The feminine is the spark that creates the flame, while the masculine is the wood that starts the fire and keeps it burning. The feminine is a compass, adapting and changing to keep the ship on course. Masculine energy is the ship itself, and the whole crew that keeps it going.

Both energies need the other to function. If feminine energy is the flag, masculine energy is the flagpole. Whether within an individual, within a couple, or within a team, there needs to be a mixture of each energy to be successful. These energies co-exist in three different ways: balanced, dominant, and flowing.

Balanced: In a balanced dynamic, the masculine and feminine energies are present in fairly equal measure.

Dominant: In a dominant dynamic, one energy is much more present than the other. Yet, there is always still some of the other. Think about yin/yang, there is always a small circle within the larger piece.

Flowing: In a flowing dynamic, each energy is harnessed when it’s most appropriate to do so.

Energetic Polarity


We each have a balance of masculine and feminine energy, and here’s where it gets really juicy. When one partner is more dominantly embodying the opposite energy of their partner, it creates “polarity”. This creates a strong sexual and romantic pull towards our partner. These don’t have to be static either. You can each embody the masculine or the feminine more strongly at different times, the key is to just make sure there’s always polarity.

As Tantric author David Deida says, “Sexual attraction is based on sexual polarity. All natural forces flow between two poles. The masculine and feminine poles between people create a flow of sexual energy in motion”.

Okay, so now you have a sense of what each energy is like, what systems are commonly used to use the energy, and how the dominant embodiment of opposing energetics creates polarity. So, now my gift to you is a few of the tools I teach my clients, that you can use TODAY to harness these energetics to improve your love life.

Harnessing Energetics in Relating-ships

1- Honour the polarity in the relating-ship.
If there’s something about your partner that’s very different than you, enjoy their individuality, instead of seeing it as a flaw. Instead of saying “the way you did/said that was so weird”, try saying “Wow, what a unique approach, I never would have thought of that!”.

2- Turn criticism into appreciation.
If you feel like you do more than your partner in ANY area of your relationship, instead of criticizing your partner for doing less, look to see if there’s another side to that coin, and show verbal appreciation for it.

For example; perhaps you feel like your partner doesn’t help enough with the dishes, but they do take the trash out every week. You could say “I really appreciate how you always take the trash out, I love not having to think about it”. As a bonus, feeling appreciated may even inspire them to do more in other areas.

3- Celebrate duality.
Make a list of areas in which you feel you and your partner are opposites. Then look for ways you can celebrate that duality. Bonus points if your celebration also involves helping each other.

For example; if one of you is very organized and a good planner, and the other is the better cook, maybe the organized person can plan the meals for the week and do the grocery shopping, while the other does the cooking. This is a fantastic way to work smarter instead of harder.


Working with your masculine and feminine energies can be a fantastic tool for self-love and care, connection, productivity, and so much more. Start exploring today and see how it works for you. There’s no right or wrong way to go about it!

Until next time,

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